I know now that going into 09 I will be attending church more and hearing some word because it was just snowing, raining and thundering all at the same time a minute ago here in DC. Now the sun is shining! God is def trying to tell us something.
We living in them last days yall! Remember when old people used to say that to you when you were a kid and scare the crap out of you lol.
I like millions of others was so elated on the night of Nov 4th when we found out that Barack Obama would be our next president. And I was even more excited at the thought of the events that will be taking place between Jan 16-20 2009: the Inaugural Parties and Balls! Every black celebrity will be in town for the festivities. And I was going to make sure I was up in the mix at somebodies party/ball. That was until I saw the ridiculous prices some people are trying to charge to party like a rockstar!!!
Case in point, I saw this website for the Hip Hop Inaugural Ball: Celebrating the Inauguration of Barack Obama And The Hip Hop Community for Inspiring the Transformation of America *side-eye*. Really? Inspiring the transformation of America huh? Ummmkaaay, but anyway I was excited because this sounded like this was the party to be at, besides the actual balls BO will personally be attending. That was until I saw the ticket prices.
250 Pre Sale Sold Out *Of Course*
500 Limited *Your Kidding Me Right?*
1000 General *What the Hell?!*
2500 VIP *WTF?!?*
I guess someone missed the memo that we are in a recession. I mean seriously 2500g's? Barack, Michelle, Oprah, Stedman, Will Smith and Jada, Ronnie Bobby Rickey AND Mike all better be up in that piece! I have a feeling people are still trying to cash in on Obama Mania and that's just wrong. Barack would NOT be pleased!
So I guess I'll just settle for the Parade with the other thousands of people on the 20th. I wonder will the federal government be closed? Another free holiday.....SCORE!
2008 has been one very interesting year. A lot of ish has gone down, good and bad, so lets take a moment to revisit some of the biggest stories of 08.
The Housing Market Crisis
The housing Market crisis really hit a new low in 08 with foreclosures getting out of control. Houses were being sold on eBay for a buck! And people were and still are losing their homes left and right. All on the back of shady lenders giving home loans to people they knew couldn't afford the mortgage *smh*.
Economic Stimulus
George Dub-ya finally admitted that the nation was in financial trouble and decided to give every American(who qualified) an economic stimulus rebate check. Either you got 600 if you were single, 1200 per married couple and an additional 300 per child or if you’re like me you got nathin and still waiting on that ish, bastids! This however failed to boost the economy but hey….it was free money!
RIP
We lost a lot of great entertainers this year. From Heath Ledger and Estelle Getty to Bernie Mac aka Uncle Bernie *I still tear up at episodes of Bernie Mac Show* and Isaac Hayes. RIP.
The Big Bailout
After phucking up peoples monies for years the ish finally hit the fan with the failing housing market and economy causing big banks like Bank of America ,Citi Group and JP Morgan Chase to go crawling on their hands and knees to the government for them to bail them out. And what did the govment do? Bail them beeshes out! 750 billion to be exact.
McCain Palin 08
After realizing that he may not have a chance to win the presidency, McCain tried to pull a "power move" and announced that his VP running mate would be a no name former beauty queen, hawky mom building bridges to nowhere in Alaska, 17 year old daughter getting pregnant having, glasses wearing, winking at the camera, Peggy Hill lookin girl named Sarah Palin. Not even McCain would listen to his advisors that told him hell naw to picking her. But hey it all worked out in the end didn’t it *winks* !
Bigga Wedding
After being together for about 40 years Jay put a ring on it and they FINALLY decided to jump the broom. They even had an elaborate ceremony that they tried to hide and took months for them to finally admit they were indeed married and publically wear their wedding rings. Like we really cared...
Chrianna and Nariah
We also saw the birth of Chrianna and Nariah. I guess Rhi Rhi finally got the point the Bey was not gonna allow Jay to stand under her umber-ella so she settled for someone her own age. And who would have thought the low budget Will Smith of comedy would snag Mariah!
Gas Prices
Gas prices reached an all time high at $5 dollars in some areas this year. But thankfully it has recently fallen to below two dollars in the past three months. The lowest since 04 I believe. Hallelu-yer!
Jhud Tragedy
Who could forget the tragic saga of Jenn Hudson and the loss of her mom, brother and nephew at the hand of her sister’s husband. I think we were all on the edge of our seats when the search went on for her kidnapped nephew who was tragically found dead a couple days later.
Real Housewives of ATL
Finally we got a black version of the RH series in the Real Houswives of ATL. It was supposed to be a look inside the black elite of the ATL. The drama and pure foolishness did keep us entertained. From NeNe and her keeping it real attitude and her geigh bf Dwight to Kim and her rendition of "Tight Rope". Too bad they had to phuck it all up with frontin. How dreadful!
Yes We Did!
And of course the biggest thing of the year was Barack Obama wining the presidency of the US. History was made this year and the US is forever changed so get used to it YT! Years from now when I think back to where I was and what I was doing on that momentous moment I will always think about my fellow MS-ers and the MS Party Line. *Tears up* Now bring on the Inaugeration beeshes!!
With a year like this I can't imagine what 09 has in store
New Years is next Friday *can you believe it* so now’s the time to start thinking about those New Year Resolutions/Goals that you want to try to set and keep for the 09. Now I usually don’t do the whole resolution thing because I've always believed it to be pointless, but I'm thinking of giving it a go this year. Here are my top 5:
1 Getting rid of old baggage - Don’t know about you but ya girl has been through A LOT this year and needs to let go of some “dead weight”! *Those that know me know who I'm referring to*
2 Finish writing my novel – I really want to get it done next year so I can get published, get a movie deal, then blowuptuate and be a rioch biotch. I mean a ten year old just sold the rights to his book How To Talk to Girls *wtf* so it can happen for me too!
3 Eating Healthier – I figure my diet of McDonalds, Wendy’s, Popeyes, Chick-fil-a ect is going to eventually catch up to me as I approach thirty so might as well start now adding more fruits and veggies to my diet.
4 Being Nicer – Apparently I’m mean
5 Stop stanning Kanye West so much – I’m kinda getting tired of loving him so hard
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Aww hell who am I kidding, #5 will neva happen! Anyway we'll see how it goes. I have a strong feeling that 09 will be a great year for me *fingers crossed*!
How did I miss this?
I Love Money 2 is coming Mondays starting Jan 29, 2009 and it looks like some oldies and newbies will be joining the cast.
The Oldies
The Entertainer
Heat
Guess they still broke and living in their momma basement.
The Newbies
20 Pack
Angelique
Bonez
Buckwild
Buddah
Cali *Guess she didn't win Chances heart*
Ice
It
Leilene
Milf *Guess she didn't win Real's heart*
Myamee
Onix
Saaphyri *Guess that Lip Chap and Indian herre deal ain't work out*
Tailor Made
Tamara
T Weed *his lying azz*
clickhere for cast pics.
Wow. This should make for some excellent primetime foolishness. I know I'll be watching! And is it me or is VH1 straight reality show heaven now?!
It's the battle of the two black networks. For years BET has been the sole all Black network to keep us entertained. But has recently went down the toilet with crappy programming such as inappropriate videos, vj's that suck and their BET blackbuster movies like Baby Boy and Soul Plane.
Enter stage left TV One. With it's bringing back old classic shows like Martin, Living Single, Eve, and the short lived Between Brothers and For Your Love. Now they even got Sanford and Son and Half and Half coming on in the 09!
But not to be outdone BET brought back Smart Guy, when Taj Mowrey was cute, and now Family Matters and One on One. And put on three seasons of pure phluckery with the Keysha Cole show. Debra Leeeeevillll is really trying to compete.
So is there room for both in the world of television? I think there is. But BET betta watch it's back cause TV One is slowly creeping up on em to take over. Oh and if you haven't seen the infamous BET episode check it out below.
LOL!
Of course they snatched the full episode off youtube. Bastids!
I don't know about yall but this is one of my favorite Christams songs!
Just makes me all warm and fuzzy on the inside *sigh*
Now I love me some Run's House, even watch the re-runs, but is it really neccessary for Angela and Vanessa to get their own show? I mean do that have that much more going on in their lives that can't be shown on Runs House? Even though Imjusayin....I'll still probably watch *sigh*.
In light of the economic crisis the Treasury Department has issued a new dollar.
Yeah that's a pretty acurate depiction lol!
This obviously was not a McDonald's in the Hood.
Cops: Man tries to pay for meal with pot
A McDonald's cashier called 911 after a Vero Beach drive-thru customer allegedly offered to pay for his meal with marijuana. The Indian River County Sheriff's Office said the cashier called Monday with a description of the vehicle the suspect had been riding in.
A deputy spotted the vehicle, found marijuana in the car and arrested its occupant, 27-year-old Shawn Alexander Pannullo.
Pannullo was charged with possession of cannabis and posted $500 bail. It was unclear if he had an attorney.
Now you know Tyrone and Nem at the McD's on Martin Luther King Blvd would not have refused this offer!
Of this fools hair!
I mean how does he get it so silky lookin and stuff?!?!? I need to make an appointment with the Dominicans stat so my herrrr can look like this.
So my three year old just did the cutest thing. She was watching The Backyardigans, a hugely popular cartoon on Nick Jr for those who don't have kids yet, and she goes over to the speakers and starts talking in them. I'm like "Zoe what are you doing?" and she responds "I'm trying to talk to Tasha"(one of the charachters)then she yells "Taaashaaa can you hear me" into the speaker lol. Kids.....gotta love em!
I sometimes like to visit the sites stuufwhitepeoplelike and stuffeducatedblackpeoplelike for a good laugh and dose of the truth. So I was thinking about things I personally know black people like, since I am black, and came up with my own personal short list:
Messing up a name with “unique” spelling
Black people have recently started to get away from the typical Shaniquas Diamonds and Trevonnes and move on to more normal traditional names. I mean we do want our kids to get jobs in their future! But then some of us still mess it up with some crazy spelling trying to be “different“. For example I found this on yahoo:
I need help with my baby's name!!! Lots of questions!!!?
Ok. So I have a couple of question. I am having a baby girl. I am stuck between the names, Camryn or Kennedy!! Well I am also stuck on the spelling of Kennedy because I want to change it and also a middle name for my daughter. Hear are the spellings I like: Kennedi & Kynnede. I was trying to spell it with a "C" because both of her parents name begins with a "C", but no luck. So the questions are:
Which name you like best? Camryn or Kennedy
Which spelling for Kennedy? Kennedi or Kynnede
Do you know a different spelling for either name?
Do you have a good middle name?
Thanks for all your help!!! I look forward to your answers.
Why the hell would you spell Kennedy, Kennedi or Kynnede?!? I’ve had this strange phenomenon occur in my immediate family too. Instead of my sister-in-law just spelling my nieces’ name E-R-I-C-A she had to be “different and spell it Airika!
Asians
Black people love Asians. We have to, who else is gonna cook that bomb shrimp egg foo young with extra gravy and then turn around and sell that Hawaiian silky number 12? When you actually sit down and think about it black people alone pay Asians billions of dollars a year in the purchasing of hair care products, Chinese food, and nail care! Lord help us if they ever decide to migrate back to Asia!
Not Prioritizing
Black people love to not prioritize. Some of us will spend over 300 dollars and some concert tickets to see Maxwell or a new Coach purse but the car note is two months behind and you have until the 12th to pay your rent or be evicted. And men if you are over the age of 25 and are pushin a new Lincoln navigator with two motorcycles and are still living in your momma basement giving her only 300 dollars a month eating up all her food in the fridge and have made no plans to go out and find your own place....you need to prioritize!
Saying I’m Blessed
Black people can have cancer, emphazima, one eye, your dog just died, lost their job, about to get put out they house and still when you ask how they doing their response is “I’m blessed”. Gotta give it to us though, we some positive mofos lol.
Thinking up excuses the night before when we call into work
I have done this. The night before when I’ve made up my mind I’m calling into work I will almost stress myself out trying to find a good excuse I will give my employer for why I will not be coming. A simple “I’m sick” is not good enough anymore so we have to get creative. I’ve had one co-worker(who is black) tell me they came right out and told the super “Look I have the bg’s so I’m not going to be able to make it today”.
The list just goes on and on. Ahhhh black people…..gotta love us!
Question:
Is Snapple really made form the best stuff on Earth? I think it is. Snapple Apple has to be the best juice EVER made! Can you say Snapple Apple is Apple Snapple fast three times?
*sigh* It's Saturday.....I'm drinking Snapple Apple.....and I'm bored *deep sigh*
Here in the DC area we have a car dealership called Eastern Motors and they have their own set of commercials. It's crazy because it's like a DC trademark. You know you are in the DMV when you hear or see an Easterns commercial. Take a look.
Okay that last one takes the cake lol! But there are a plethora others on youtube. Now lets all sing together kids:
At Eastern Motors
Your jobs your credit
At Eastern Motors
Your jobs yor credit
400 chevy beamers and mini vans
Over 600 cars trucks suvs are you listening man
Let Eastern Motors
Put you in a car today
At Eastern Motors
Finance it all the way
They fail to tell you their 400% interest rates though.
Today I had to perform my “civic duty” and go to Jury Duty. I was so pissed last night when I had to call that 1-800 number to see if I had to report and they called my number. The last time I had to actually go to the court house to serve was when I was 21 and I’m 28 now! Then they want you there at 7:30 and make you sit for almost 2 hours before they start calling people for a panel to go to the actual court room for jury selection. And of course my name gets called for a civil case. So as we’re sitting in the courtroom I’m keeping a serious mean mug on my face so they attorney’s would be like “we’re not picking her, she look mean and like she’ll vote guilty no matter what”. Well it seemed to work because I didn’t get pick, hallelu-jer! But they did pick a lady who said tomorrow was supposed to be her first day at her new job and another lady who said her husband was the only one working and she had to stay home and take care of her two year old. That was foul. And the case was gonna be three to four days! Aww well Jury Duty can now, like the Senate Insurance commercials, Kiss My Bumper…Just Kiss It ahhhhahahahaha! For the next three years at least.
DMC, Disney Movie Club for those of you who aren’t familiar, really think they slick. They entice you in with their get 500 dvd’s for only 10.99 deal but then make you sign an agreement that you have to purchase four more movies at their movie club price, which is about 30 bucks, to fulfill their agreement/contract. Well it wouldn’t be a bad deal but once you join all the movies they have are crap! I mean they didn’t even have the Lion King. How you not gonna have Simba and Mufasa? Was the Lion King not the biggest Disney movie EVER!?! Then they don’t remind you over the course of the two years that you still have x number of dvd’s to purchase to fulfill the agreement.
So yesterday I received a letter in the mail thanking me for joining their “club” BUT I hadn’t bought the four movies that I promised when I joined. That’s a lie cause I know I at least bought two over the past two years, *sidenote- I will be disputing this matter*. And they had the nerve to enclose an order form and DEMAND that I choose four titles right then and there WITH the payments enclosed! DMC PLEASE! Yall will get my choices and money when I’m good and ready to give it to you and I DARE yall to say otherwise! Now I understand why they been sending me movies that I know I have declined in the Director’s Selection. These bastids better not mess up my credit on the back of this either.
Kids can be brutally honest sometimes. I have a pimple on my face, we all get them no big deal.....until my daughter comes up to me and says "Ewww you have a bump on your face"
*sigh*
I'm pretty sure many of you have seen this e-mail but for those who haven't please take time to read and comprehend the following:
During an hour's swimming at a municipal pool you will ingest 1/12 litre of urine.
In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with 15 penises (touching door handles, etc.)
An average person's yearly fast food intake will contain 12 pubic hairs.
In a year you will have swallowed 14 insects - while you slept!
Annually you will shake hands with 2 women who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.
Annually you will shake hands with 26 men who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.
In a lifetime 22 workmen will have examined the contents of your dirty linen basket.
At an average wedding reception you have a 1/100 chance of getting a cold sore from one of the guests.
Daily you will breath in 1 liter of other peoples' anal gases.
Moral: WASH YO HANDS!!!
I’m convinced that my agency has adopted a Crazy Outreach Program. I’ve noticed an influx of crazy and deranged looking people walking around my job. In the elevators…the snackbar…my own office. I’m told that background checks are done here but I KNOW there are some criminals or past offenders among me! Earlier I was on the elevator with a woman who was talking to herself, I mean having a SERIOUS conversation, and I’m giving her the “side-eye” cause if she makes ONE false move I’ma hafta take her down! The government is def an Equal Opportunity Employer. They’ll hire anyone! Got a crazy relative that can’t get a job just send them over to USA Jobs.Gov and tell em to apply.
So it has been brought to my attention that my neighbors have been stealing my Netflix movies. I've noticed that I keep getting e-mails from Netflix saying they received movies back that I never got in the first place! Now when we first moved into this house there was an incident where my movies were delivered to the wrong address but the people were nice enough to bring them back, UNOPENED, and explain that they had gotten them by mistake.
But whoever is getting them now decided to 1. open them up, 2. watch them and keep them for 3-4 days, 3. return them! And I know how long they keeping the movies because Netflix gives you a date they were sent out and a date received back. Now I'm at a crossroads because I don't know who to really blame, the dumb postman who keeps delivering them to the wrong address or my ghetto neighbors. Got me side-eyeing every house as I walk to the mailbox!
*Sigh* Jesus please be a swing vote to help Obama get into office so that the housing market can turn around and I can sell my house and move back to Northern Virginia with the yt people!
Barack talking about McCain:
“Who is it that he’s going to tell that change is coming?” Obama asked. “I mean, come on, they must think you’re stupid!”
HELLO!!! Yes Old Man River McCain thinks and WANTS the american people to be stupid so we can go through eight more years of the mess we're already in. And I was highly upset that he's now trying to jack Barack's whole "Change" theme. Get your own ish McLame!!! Please make sure you vote the Obama Way in November. And if you know anyone who isn't registered to vote, make sure you help get them registered. And if they refuse threaten their life and the lives of their children!!! Just kidding on the last part but this is serious buisness.
Today all employees at my job received an e-mail from security about actions that should be taken in the event of a mail/telephone bomb threat( I work for the gubment). Here’s what actions they feel Management should be taking:
Evaluate the threat and take proper search actions
Notify local police, FPS and appropriate emergency services
Evacuate IF necessary
Here’s what actions I feel people with any sense should be taking:
RUN BEESH RUN!
I’m sorry but if I hear of any threat in the building I’m out! We went through this not too long ago where another agency in our building had received a “suspicious” package and their employees were released, but our agencies employees were still sitting up in the building looking stupid(myself included). Then FINALLY security comes on the loud speaker talking about “There was a suspicious package reported on the 17th floor, you might want to gather your belongings and leave.” And what did that do? Cause a twenty minute backup out the parking garage! Let’s get it together people.
If you’re anything like me, you HATE using public restrooms. Sometimes I’ll wait for hours just to use a clean bathroom in the comfort of my home. I don’t know about men’s restrooms but the women’s are just plain nasky! Seriously, it’s like no one taught them proper bathroom etiquette. Well I’m here to help. Here’s my very own list of do’s and dont’s in el bano:
Do: Give a courtesy flush while doing #2. I mean you can smell that ish and know it stinks, do you really want other’s in the bathroom to suffer too?
Don’t: Leave pee on the toilet seat. You don’t do that at home, so wipe that ish off!
Do: Make sure you properly dispose of feminine hygiene products. Looking at my own is traumatizing enough, I don’t need to see yours!
Don’t: Take any food items into the bathroom or they will be infected with nasky bathroom germs and deemed inedible.
Do: Make sure you use a toilet seat cover if you can’t squat or have to do #2. And to be extra careful none of your skin touches any of the toilet seat, place some toilet tissue over any parts the seat cover doesn’t reach.
Don’t: Leave pubic hair on the seat. It’s disgusting!
Do(Extremely Important): Wash your hands before exiting the bathroom. And if you see someone about to leave out who didn’t wash their hands, make it a point to either say “You not gonna wash your hands?” or if your are too afraid to do that get a good look at them so in the future you can avoid anything they touch and tell everybody you know how nasky “such and such” is cause they don’t wash their hands!
Don’t: touch the door handle on the way out. Grab the handle with a napkin. The lady who didn’t wash her hand just touched it!
I’m getting nauseas just typing all of this. But following these simple rules will make your bathroom experience slightly more tolerable. Maybe I should anonymously post this on the bathroom door at work.
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